Log in

No account? Create an account
15 September 2014 @ 07:09 pm
The First Thing People Notice About Me Is...  
So it's time for an update, went out with the gang from work again this last weekend. I never want to stay out late on Saturday night again, or any night for that matter, I want to go to sleep by 1 am at the latest every night. Unless there's sex involved ... I'll sacrifice sleep for sex, but that's IT.

Once again wound up the Onyx Club, it was a wonderful experience for me because I did not get belligerently, black out drunk for once in my life. It was such an eye opening experience! I got to watch my co workers make complete fools out of themselves. Not that this matters anyway, people like us are far more sophisticated than the average Roseville Club attendee. They might have been laughing at us Saturday night, but we'll be laughing at them for the rest of our lives as they spell our names wrong on our Starbuck's drinks. Yes, there are pictures and videos I could post to embarrass us all but I feel I'm above that.

The night out in the club was also a good experience for me because I got to see what the guys in those places are like and the kind of girls they "hook up" with. I feel so happy to see that I was not missing anything and I know I'm not going to miss anything by avoiding the club scene in the future. I don't think I'll go out in Roseville again if I am not desperately bored. I might go to a real club in a big city someday, even the one I got thrown out of in Sacramento was nice.

Then came the horrifying realization Sunday morning that when I die I'm going to be found half eaten by at least 10 cats, likely weeks after my actual death because I'll be living in a huge mansion out in the middle of nowhere with all my cats. The post man would probably find me or something...Ha! That was pretty dark, but anyway, if the man I want isn't in the downtown area of my home town or online what am I supposed to do? So I woke up Sunday and got back on the fucking online dating site.

I had a good afternoon Sunday with Dwight (I guess this is sticking, I don't even remember how this started) and the Old Man (This is going to be permanent because this guy is obviously self conscious about his age and feels the need to mention it every time the opportunity arises) at the sports bar I frequented when I first moved to town. I got to see a bit of the Lions game, unfortunately, Dwight made them lose because we decided to leave the bar for a little while. I assisted the Broncos in defeating the Chiefs by not wearing my Broncos shirt. Yes, this is really how it works, despite Dwight's comment to me, "You know, that's not ACTUALLY how it happens." I guess I did kind of say it like I really meant it, and I do.

So here I am, trying to think about what people notice first about me or what my ideal Friday night is like because apparently old men are better at creating this bullshit than I am. I think I got it figured out though, I'm getting better results than the last time I tried this. Of course, I have also widened the age gap to men over the age of 30, I guess I was in denial about being 26 and still thought I was 17 or something. Ha! Honestly tho, if I think back on all the successful relationships or men I've enjoyed spending time with, they were all much older than I was. I was probably feeling pressure by social media or something and decided I had to be with someone my own age. Where's that plane guy from last year? I'll never forget that flight to Boston, and he had children closer to my age than he was! Oh well, no use crying over spilt... ....

I think I'm really nailing it with a 29 year old right now! I think I've also nailed my profile since I'm not really getting that many ridiculous messages. We'll see, I'll update if this goes any where. Hopefully I end up getting nailed too.

I discovered the best feeling today. Jumping into a cold pool on a 100 degree day in September. It was seriously the best sensation of my life, all the kids were at school, all the adults were at work - it was amazing. I also managed to get a tan on the day I called in "sick" to work, oh well. Another wonderful discovery is sitting in the corner of my couch drinking orange juice and sprite and typing on my laptop. Why have I never sat in the corner of my couch? This is so comfortable! I need a new TV stand so I can watch netflix from here..yes ... yes I do.

So Drogie ran away last night and still isn't back, hopefully he's out with Oreo. I'm not feeding those dicks until they come back.

-Gossip Lady
Current Location: Home
Current Mood: chipperchipper
Current Music: Sweet Home Alabama - Skynard