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19 August 2014 @ 11:26 pm
I Know Which House I'm Buying.  
I've been metaphorically house shopping lately.

I got to have my big in the office interview, it was pretty exciting and FANCY! I wore my nice new business suit (that was a f*ing hassle to shop for, apparently I'm a "petite plus size" ... what the fuck is that, it's like "oh, you're fat but...not". I swear, it's so annoying right now! It's like I'm too skinny for the fat clothes and too fat for the skinny clothes. My closet is like half clothes that are too big for me and half clothes that I am waiting to wear until I get there. It is pleasantly surprising to be pulling out new clothes all the time. This is such a long rant to be parenthesized! I think I should keep going ...) and my new shoes that were very uncomfortable, despite wearing them all day the day before. I think that was a dumb idea because my feet were just sore from wearing them the day before. I wonder if I were to put them on now if they would be comfortable. I'll figure the shoe thing out eventually, I like 'em so I'll figer it out. Enough about my narcissistic love of fashion, so the interview(s) went pretty well I'd say. I talked to 2 guys that were typical consulting manager types and a girl of the "senior associate" level who was pretty nice. I really liked the fancy office! However, I do have a lot to think about, it's like 100% traveling and I don't know what will happen to my kittens, I don't want to miss Drogie becoming an adult -- or do I?

Sleeping with Drogie has become like sleeping with a velociraptor (that word isn't in this HTML's editor's dictionary, how fucking stupid, like no one is going to blog about velociraptors, get it together LJ or I'll take my business elsewhere.) I have to remain perfectly still or he attacks, it's like the scene in Jurassic Park where the kids are hiding in the kitchen (probably the only scene of that movie I've ever really seen) and they have to be still so the raptor (oh, raptor's in the dictionary, give me a break) doesn't get them. I started sleeping with my squirt bottle under my pillow. If I lock him out he just gets angry and attacks the door all night, throwing his penguin at it like some kind of battering ram, it's out of control.

Went on another date last night...epic fail. "Travis" the "hotel manager" was BALD (none of the OKCupid pictures were of a bald guy) and a complete loser who had just been FIRED for being a "whistleblower" - ugghhh!! So I went home and deleted all my online dating shit permanently. Fuck it, I'm just going to let things happen naturally the old fashioned way. I'm already sick of dating! It's all a damn hoax I say, everyone just wants to meet in person right away and I don't know why, so we can have an awkward forced conversation and I can avoid sexual topics and try to dodge you trying to kiss me at the end of the awful date? Anyway, that's done, I hope I don't ever try online dating again.

I'm realizing lately that I'm 100% a different person today than I was 3 years ago today. For some reason I keep re-living and thinking a lot about my "dark period" I'm going to refer to it like they do artists because my life is like a body of art work, there was a dark period. I was thinking about pulling out some of those paintings here in this diary. But what would the point be? It's in the past, fuck it, I want to live in the future.

So I guess we're doing the BD tomorrow and the DP on Thursday. If the company I work for wants to keep people around they need to start paying for these damn drinking nights, it's like "oh to increase morale let's make everyone hang out in a bar and buy their own drinks." I bet KPMG buys their employees drinks...just sayin...Today was pretty damn funny tho, I would miss all the DP's.

FInally going to finish True Blood tonight, it's taken 3 nights because I keep passing out after like 20 minutes.

XO XO
-Gossip Lady
 
 
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